01 April 2015

Always Running for the Thrill of it


Today I joined a 4 hour Skype conference call with GWU and Stanford.
During the video conference, I got an email notifying I got the scholarship and internship I applied for two months ago. (yay!) An hour later, in the middle of class, I got a flood of notifications from my colleagues/co-workers telling me to check my email and spam 'CONGRATS' into my texting applications with the sudden interruption from my professor asking me to tell the class the correct answer to the homework sets. All good and happy things. I've been really happy at school. One of my colleagues got into graduate school, three of our people got a super prestigious science award/funding (16,000 applied, 2,000 awarded in the USA, 10 awarded to our school, and out of that 10 we had 3), and another paper of ours got approved to be published. I am scheduled to work 17 hours a week, but I've been working 7 hours overtime- I don't even mind! I feel as if I've found a new group of people I can click in with. But sometimes I'll look back at everyone I've left behind and it makes me sad. Are y'all well? How are you? What's going on, what's happening?

Someone told me something the other day when I couldn't stop whining about the past: "It simply meant that our...[past]...just couldn't keep up with us". It's such an asshole way to put it, but 100% on point. I guess in a way, I couldn't keep up with some of my past, and in other ways my past couldn't keep up with me.

Today, for the first time, I had also the thoughts of dropping my ballet class because it has been heavily interfering with one of my biggest commitments.

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