28 February 2014

And I don't care how high we are

Currently: burning 12 oz Saijo Persimmon Voluspa candle
Now Playing: What So Not | High You Are (branchez remix)

Soaking myself in The City and Olivia Palermo's bitchiness, screaming "twinning!!!" inside every time I see her glare at lowly peasants, all while working.
I just want to get out of here and live my dream.

Not just all talk, I promise I'm working hard on trying to make it happen.

Can't wait for the weekend to come,
I have so much planned.


13 February 2014

"This is the hardest thing I've ever had to do, 
but I'm still in it...because I think it's worth it"

I'm so sorry. But I am always grateful for your patience, and thankful for the endless forgiveness you spare to me time to time.
I've never seen a love deeper than the ocean or feistier than the day's sun.
And no matter what people say about us, I know that your love roots deeply into the center of our souls and binds us tightly together, allowing no one to loosen the knots we tie.
And to be able to have you as my trusty anchor to guide my ships home when the sea gets rough,
well ... I can't say enough how lucky I am to have you.

xo i.

12 February 2014

What have we done

now playing: Boy From The Sun | Niva
mood: drowsy
Trying really hard to stick to a no white sugar diet, but failing incredibly hard and giving in everyday due to what I excuse myself to be 'stress overload'.  Also trying hard to sleep earlier and wake up early everyday, the improvement isn't very rapid, but there IS improvement which I guess is what matters the most.

I made a playlist of good songs on my other account, because I haven't been doing that for the past few years, which make me guilty, and feel like anything but my creative self.

(I think) I'm starting to feel a sense of urgency, so my pace is picking up with being more independent.

Starbucks is promoting their usual annual "Share The Love" promotion this Friday, I think I'm going to buy B a cup of hazelnut macchiato :)

xo i.

ps, on another note- I've been so stressed that it's taken me over an hour to fall asleep even though it's the wee hours of A.M. , and the fact that I've been stress eating i.e.) an entire 4.5" diameter grapefruit in one sitting at 2am.
pps, I just had a random flashback to summer in Sonoma Valley, and even though I don't drink wine, I feel really....sad and yearn to be back in the lovely sun, venturing through vineyards, and dreaming under the misty skies.

11 February 2014


There's not enough time.
There's not enough time because I don't know how to draw lines.

There's not enough time in this world. Not enough.

10 February 2014

You Don't See Me Standing Here

now playing: dancing on my own | robyn

Sometimes you just have to relax and trust that things will eventually fall into place.

I'm in the corner, watching you kiss her,
I'm right over here, why can't you see me, 
I'm giving it my all, but I'm not the girl you're taking home,
I keep dancing on my own..

...I just came to say goodbye.


07 February 2014


now playing: 3 days | Rhye
I want to get back into yoga. Thinking back to how happy and open-hearted it made me when I practiced yoga, just tempts me and reminds me how much of a positive impact it was.
I should also look into study abroad and see why my application has been started, maybe it's a sign in addition to the continual run-ins with my ex-roommate who keeps asking if I've applied for abroad programs yet.

Another thing I've been really addicted to is studying at the local library by the beach. It's so beautiful, secluded yet packed with people all the time. It's like the best of...all worlds.
It always feels like I'm heading to my local paradise when I drive there, looking out the windows in between studying makes good daydreaming study breaks, and when it's time to go home, the sunset sky is always beautiful.

I started watching GirlsHBO season 3 this past week, and I think this season deals with a lot more real life-problems. It is a little heavy hearted at times, but I know that things will fluctuate back up in a few episodes or so. Marnie makes me sad to watch her make appearances because her broken heart reminds me of my past, but I'm really happy that she is so strong and uses working out as an anger-releasing alternative. She is actually a hidden 'subconscious' motivation for me this season (for a lack of better terms). And Shosh... I used to think she was SO annoying but as the episodes add up, and now that she's in school, her personality and newly developed maturity actually makes her really funny (instead of obnoxious) and sometimes I feel like "oh my goodness! I can relate to Shosh so well! Ahahah she reminds me of me sometimes!" I peeked at wikipedia, and I saw that GirlsHBO has been renewed for another season (4) and I am so excited! I hope GirlsHBO never stop! :)

Dew Drops

now playing: Bed Peace | Jhene Aiko x Childish Gambino
mood: relaxed

It is 1:31 am right now.
I went out side for a little bit a few minutes ago, and it felt amazingly fresh.
It is still raining, and I wish that it would never stop.
Looking up, I could see the dewy drops of water covering the night sky like fog.
Extremely beautiful and ethereal,
for a moment I thought I was in another world.