10 December 2013

things i love tuesdays

+ hot drinks {lattes / teas}
+ pink peonies
+ girlsHBO
+ tweed jacket.
+ skirts
+ brunching
+ d'orsay flats
+ Musée d'Orsay
+ Viktor & Rolf's Flowerbomb
+ chatting with friends at breakfast
+ accessorizing with scarves

+ good playlists.

09 December 2013


The softness of your skin, graces me under the pale moonlight.
Your tender lips, gradient pink and white in a perfect oval, misshaped.
And those doe like eyes, looking just so shallowly into me. Missing all my sins.

I touch your shoulder, and let my fingers run down your arm.
Your skin, so beautiful, a tender raw white.
Our palms touch and fingers align.
You firmly grasp my hand and you speak to me.
I cannot hear you.
But you smile at me.

Spin your head towards the window towards the unlit-back of the cabin.
We sit under the glass window, tagged by the moon light.
Beautiful long, snow hair creating the most perfect circular rotation, just barely grazing me as they pass to catch up with you.
You point and tell me that just beyond those hills, lay a beautiful oasis, filled with beauty, youth, innocence, and safety.
Fear fills your eyes as you tell me...
We need to go
I hold your face close and cradle your chin.
Forehead against yours, I close my eyes and tell you not to worry, because you are safe with me.

I feel your soul warm up as you give me your trust.
It's time
With movement slower than the pulse of a heavy heart, I draw you close, and fixed pose you lay your lips on mine, and with a cracked smile, I don't hesitate as I suck all the goddamn filthy innocence out of you.

Lifeless, your beautiful body folded over upon itself on the darned wood.
Hair caressing your broken porcelain skin.
Lips faded black,
 so I thought.

Did you really think that I would fall for that, for you?
I love a good beauty, no need denying that.

08 December 2013

Scared to make the move that would bring me a step closer to my dreams that I've had since the beginning of high school. I'm scared because I don't want my parents to get mad at me or people to judge me. I want to be there and I want to get there. But I don't want to be laughed at because I have no skills or talent.

I have such big stupid dreams that only a few people could ever relate to or understand. 

06 December 2013

my text book questions that no body will ever answer

On a quest to find a way for mature stem cells to not reduce with increasing age....

-I wonder if there's anyway to slightly speed up cell duplication and then use very mild chemotherapy to cleanse our bodies of mutations.
-So you mean if one day, we run out of combinations for recombination, does that mean that we won't have enough diversity to cover our immune system? Or does our variety increase as viruses and bacteria grow stronger and multiply?
-Does that mean that cold sores use recombination to insert their genetic material into the cells on/around my lip's DNA?
-By using recombination can we create the perfect child?

05 December 2013

I am tired of being ugly.
I want my dreams to come true.

But I think that's up to me to make it happen. Because as I like to believe, we chose to be who we are today.


welcome home

xo i

Lessons on Thursdays

Really disappointed in myself in wasting time, and being too stuck up three to five years ago.
I could have build bridges with really good people across the globe now.

I guess I'll just have to learn from these mistakes and be more humble, and appreciate what I have and take the time to absorb things when I can.

01 December 2013

chic obsessions

Smoking flats, midi skirts, pleated skater skirts, and (most) dresses are so chic!
Pink peonies as well, with a glass of pink champagne and dreamy film photography.
And seal it off with strawberry lipstick.


Kate Bogucharskaia by Billy Kidd.

It's December 1st.
Where did all of November go?

25 November 2013


The best beauty secrets are Bikram yoga & sleep...and no worrying.
And don’t wear too much makeup.” 
- Ms. Erika Bearman
Most definitely agreed with.

24 November 2013

I want to go to Paris. 
I want to go to NYC for new years. 
I want to live in NYC. 

21 November 2013

I'm so excited for my new blog.
I can't wait for big things to happen.
I'm shooting too high, dreaming too big, but new things are always so exciting.

I'll get my heartbreak later on.

stylevelib, named after a combination of my love- styling, and well not quite exactly [the] vélib [system] but rather Paris and my adoration for Parisian's simple, effortless, chic style sense.

Actually. I hate the work I post up because I don't think it looks good enough.
Quality over quantity, I have to keep that in mind.

17 November 2013


- lavenders
- new york city
- sun kissed photos
- ice skating at the Rockefeller
- morning after snowfall
- gossip girl marathons
- train rides
- late night talks
- strawberry coloured lip stains
I just want to be beautiful.
I want to be beautiful enough for New York City, and smart enough for Los Angeles.

05 November 2013


"That's the thing you need to be cold to be queen. Anne Boleyn thought only with her heart and she got her head chopped off. So her daughter Elizabeth made a vow never to marry a man. She married her country. Forget boys, keep your eye on the prize...  
You can't make people love you, but you can make them fear you."

02 November 2013

I am so conflicted.

 Burying myself within the comforts of Xx's beautiful sounds.

Asphyxiate your troubles, 
letting a velvety viscous crawl over you 
soothing you into a deep warm eternal slumber.
I don't think I can even breathe anymore. 
Because drawing in takes too much effort 
it's better to just murmur. 

31 October 2013


One of the worst things in high school was that I got on bad terms with a few people, and after fighting with them I thought it'd be over, but because those people had formsprings or those anonymous comment boxes, they would keep thinking that the anonymous users harassing them was me, so they would make fake profiles to come harass me online.

I didn't think anything would be more emotionally and mentally wrecking as that turned out to be.
I will never be able to forget the things they said to me or about me to other people in hopes of destroying my reputation, image, social circle in my "low"s as the words echo around my head from time to time. I have forgiven them, even though they did ruin my reputation at school, shattered my image in class, and basically banished me from any social circles and pushed me to become friendless and self relying ever moment at school. But I think this is the main reason why I don't want to be friends with anyone or a lot of people, and especially boys that had mouths that flowed with charming words or girls in general. This is also why I can't trust people after you give me a bad impression once, even if you make it up. I learn that with one chance you can learn if the person is trustworthy to be your friend or not.

People also made fun of me for being too emotional.
I'm sorry you chose to consistently stalk my blog and force yourself to read about my thoughts.
I don't make fun of you for being immature or an asshole, unless you prove that you're an asshole.

For the record, I don't try to bash on anyone or say mean things about people or remarks on people or judge people until you give me a reason to.

29 October 2013


Light reflects from your shadow,
...more than I thought could exist.
You move through the room like breathing was easy.


28 October 2013


now playing: Let's Go Home | Carousel

"Yuuwaku" 誘惑 allure | (by Audrey Kawasaki)
The only reason why your life is unsatisfactory is because you allow it to be.

22 October 2013

Finding the forgotten

My most recent gems and inspirations, dug up from the past.
love aesthetics

21 October 2013

study play lists

Currently: studying for my biochemistry class
Now playing: here to listen

After 5 years, I finally think Slow Dancing in a Burning Room (acoustic) is a good song.
I'm looking into buying a (Chemix or Melitta or Hario V60) plus Hario Buono so I can make my own pour over. If not, I guess a Nespresso will suffice, except Nespresso machines are a tad pricey, and you lose the joys of making your own coffee because everything is made for you. But they carry Nespresso at Target now, so maybe Target will have a sale on them sometime?
On another note, Stumptown opened in LA, so there's another location to visit the next time we make a trip there, not to already add the ever-so-amazing Caffe Luxxe to our "go-to-again" destination.
I wish I had more time to take pictures, and to cook, bake, and make DIY blog posts.
Something I definitely need to learn is making the perfect minestrone soup.

-Coffee drinks explained
-comparing pour overs
-olive garden inspired minestrone


15 October 2013

Why did you only call me when you were high?

The most sun filled dream. Relaxed and carefree.
You were the dopest and I was there. Living in the moment.
The colors on your sleeve represented a different story from parts of your life. They roam across your chest and onto your other arm, holding me safe and anchored to ground.
We smoked and laughed, scents familiar and soothing.
Blazed and faded I can hardly make your face out but your silhouette was there.
Your voice shooting up a dose in me. Except your smile is dopey and it's stupid but it makes me laugh.
You tell me you prefer natural american spirit. I agree. Between your second and third, it reeks of familiarity and comfort.
Why did you only call me when you were high?

I wish I could see you everyday. But you only call when you're high.

id crisis

I want to cut my hair shoulder length and get my nose pierced.

I need to start shooting more and again. /clik

14 October 2013


People got a lot to say
But don't know shit about where I was made
Or how many floors that I had to scrub
Just to make it past where I am from...
You can hate it or love it
Hustle and the struggle is the only thing I'm trusting
Thorough bread in a mud brick before the budget...
My passion was ironic
And my dreams were uncommon
Guess I gone crazy, first deal changed me
Robbed blind, basically raped me
Rose through the bullshit like a matador
Just made me madder and adamant to go at em
And even the score
So, I went harder...
Pledge allegiance to the struggle
Ain't been easy
But cheers to Peezy for the weeks we lived out of duffle
Bags is all we had
Do anything for my Mama, I love you
One day I'll pay you back for the sacrifice
That ya managed to muscle
Sixteen, you sent me through customs so
All aboard my spaceship to Mercury
Turn First at the light that's in front me
Cause every night I'mma do it like it's my last
This dream is all that I need
Cause its all that I ever had
-iggy azalea

07 October 2013


I see colors when I hear your voice
Grab your wings, theyre putting gravity on trial
I see colors, I dont hear the noise, sometimes were only flying for awhile
I could love you in the falling rain,
Grab your things, this is a storm were meant to ride
Like synesthesia, aboard a stalling plane, its like were only flying for awhile, flying for awhile...

30 September 2013

Vampire Weekend x Beirut at the Hollywood Bowl

Just the set list I found online so I can forever remember the amazing concert.
(Note that Vampire Weekend played selected songs from Contra as well on this Modern Vampire of the City tour), all media below was found on and credited from tumblr.
Beirut Set List
1. Nantes
2. Mimizan
3. Postcards from Italy
4. East Harlem
5. Cocek (traditional folk song)
6. A Sunday Smile
7. The Akara
8. The Shrew
9. Elephant Gun
10. Cherbourg
11. Santa Fe
12. Vagabond
13. Coshen

Vampire Weekend Set List
1. Cousins
2. White Sky
3. Cape Cod Kwassa Kwassa
4. Diane Young
5. Unbelievers
6. Holiday
7. Step
8. Horchata
9. Everlasting Arms
10. Finger Back
11. California English
12. A-Punk
13. Ya Hey
14, Don’t Lie
15. Campus
16. Oxford Comma
17. Giving Up The Gun
18. Obvious Bicycle
19. Hannah Hunt
20. Walcott

ps Xx played sunday night at the Bowl, and arctic monkeys are at wiltern LA on monday!!!! i wish i could go!!!!

Lovely Saturday

Currently: still dazed from saturday's date
Mood: exhausted

So B bought me tickets to see Vampire Weekend for my 20th birthday, and it was a surprise..which really did catch me by surprise because we talked about it before, but the idea was not really concrete.
We started that morning by heading over to Brandy Melville's sale at OCC at around 10A, but people had lined up at 12A the night of. Since I wasn't really crazy for the sale, we just decided to go last minute and see if it was possible to make it in in a timely manner. Boy were we wrong. Following their twitter, I had seen the tweets sent out about letting two groups in already, but as we were browsing the entire line, there seemed to be more than 400 people in line still (not exaggerating on the numbers) and the line wasn't moving at all. Therefore we skipped the sale and headed to Santa Monica.
We got to SanMo at 12, and first browsed the farmer's market that was going on, then grabbed a slice of pizza at Stefano's, then shopped the promenade. After walking up and down 3rd St, we went towards Santa Monica Place where we browsed Kitson, and joined FP for their Detox and Detangle event. FP partnered with Brambila Salon and Vita Coco, and giving out free coco water and letting their customers get their hair braided. I got mine in a fishtail :)
After the fun little event, B and I went to Fred Segal. Lucky for us, they were having their huge sale! We did not get to go to the Fred Segal shop (on 420 Broadway) but instead we only had time for The Closet at Fred Segal (500 Broadway, another building). I have never been to Fred Segal before, and I am not familiar with their layout, but I can only assume that The Closet is just more contemporary clothing or high end designer clothing because the array I see inside is targeted towards young adults. Anyways I had a fun time shopping at Fred Segal, I hope to get lucky with their sale again the next time I come, about 1/3 of The Closet was 50% off!
B took me to Brentwood after Fred Segal, he said he had a little surprise for me...that is... after we go to Union Made. Union Made was in a dainty cute quiet little shopping plaza called Brentwood Country Mart. Everything is so nice and artsy in the little center and I love it so much! Turned out that the surprise he had planned for me was Caffe Luxxe. Because it was almost time for dinner, we just shared a cup of (house) cold brew, and let me tell you- oh. my. gosh. It was THE best coffee I've had yet. And B, who isn't even a coffee connoisseur was gushing over how amazing the blend was. I have to go back again! At this hour, we were already running a tad late on schedule, so we panicked about dinner. Luckily there was a nice italian venue across the street- Louise's Trattoria. I ordered the chicken piccata and B had the eggplant parmigiana. Although the service was slow, (we were sitting outside, though mind us that there were only two other tables eating at the early hour) the focaccia bread was heavenly, as was the dipping olive oil and balsamic, and both entrees were fab.

(media source: tumblr)
After that we drove super fast to Westwood, hoping we wouldn't miss our 7P shuttle. We made it just on time thankfully. The shuttle ride took about 30 min or so (the bus also left late), and we arrived at the venue at 820P, when Beirut was already performing. Zach did a talented job singing and playing the trumpet, and the set list was perfect! I was a little upset though, that some of the people...well most...around us were asking who Beirut was (yes I am offended) and when Beirut were going to be finished so they could watch Vampire Weekend. ): Ezra and his team finally came onstage after a 20 minute intermission and wow, it was lively and entertaining. To sum it up in a very short sentence- the Vampire Weekend concert at Hollywood Bowl was basically an 17376 people indie dance party where everyone sang along, cheered, and even stood up to dance. The crowd ranged from high school students to working adults. Mainly grouped around 25-28 year olds though. Most people had drank during Beirut's performance and were all giddy and jivy during Vampire Weekend, making the experience very 'jolly'. Of course, Ezra and pals, ended with an encore playing Hannah Hunt and the ole loved Walcott where for sure 100% of the crowd stood up to sing and jive along.
The concert and day was so incredibly fun, and memorable that I still find myself daydreaming over Saturday's date still. I can't wait for another opportunity like this to arise and so B and I can have fun this much again exploring and enjoying music and LA. Thank you so much again B for the amazing day!!!


19 September 2013

Waves of nostalgia floods me- I miss you.

09 September 2013

Do I Wanna Know?

Whenever I look back at my past text posts from many years ago, I feel a little proud of my works and amazed that I was able to compose works such as those. Many of those times I feel embarrassed and dumb at the moment of production. It's too bad that 90% of the things I write end up getting wiped within 24 hours.

I told myself I would blog more this summer; ended up not turning my computer on for multiple days in a row, mostly online from my phone- so I'm proud of that accomplishment, but ashamed I wasn't able to document feelings, thoughts, and emotions from every day's activities.

I am listening to some of Arctic Monkey's new album in random order, mostly from tumblr. I think the overall album is good, great, lovely, but most of the songs were not what I wanted it to be- 90's/red tartan/british rock/doc martens/electric guitar...'heavy' rock. Most of the songs are lighter, let's just say I wanted most of the album to be like "Do I Wanna Know" or "Arabella" "Knee Socks" "R U Mine"...but wait that's a lot of tracks, maybe I just haven't finished the album yet... (∴ my entire 'interpretation' so far could be wrong now...) Besides "Do I Wanna Know", I would have to say my second or 'tied' favorite song from the album is "No. 1 Party Anthem", I mean the entire groove of an album visually pictured by me, is like...(sorry I'm so bad with history/dates etc) set in the 1980's (or maybe 1960s-1980s) of a white couple in their apartment space, a girl in a bathtub on an average saturday morning rebelliously taking a smoke, sporting slighty heavy kohl eyeliner, while having her favorite rock vinyl spinning and the guy sitting in this partially opened/loosely tied bathrobe, reading the paper on some political scandal, and playing with his girl's long brown locks with his free hand and talking to her........ and there is some plants in the blue and white tiled-floor bathroom. It's a chilly 64 degree fahrenheit outside with no breeze though.

Okay time to own this bad boy on LP, or perhaps buy myself a 33⅓ rpm microgroove vinyl spinner first..

You are so hurtful. 
Everything is so hurtful about you. 

25 August 2013

Nespresso love

I want the nespresso u or nespresso pixie ugh!! long lost obsession sinceafter  Europe 2012. does that even make sense? Who cares. 

24 August 2013

Nespresso perfecto

Another perfect day today. Went to the mall after lunch with B, but we picked up shaken black tea at Boiling Point before heading over. We shopped at Zara and H&M where I picked up some tops and found a pair of really cheap yet stylish Chelsea boots. I saw some really nice pieces at Madewell which I'm hoping to save up for and B spent time in J Crew and Club Monaco looking at shirts, pants, and jackets. He decided on a nice jacket from J Crew in the end because there was also a 25% off $150+ deal. We also got ham and cheese croissants from Vie De France in between the shopping and we stopped at the Nespresso bar. I thought the Nespresso and Chelsea boots totally topped it off nicely.........absolutely happy about today. (-: 


P.s. we saw this beautiful jacket at club monaco today (totally NYC style) but kinda too expensive. But I thought I'd share. 

TGIF: update.

Had a real good day yesterday. 
Pool with B, went home to rinse off. got a java chip frap at Starbucks- yum I haven't had a frap in a while, and then we went to Barnes and Noble to read magazines. I found Frankie and Company but came home with only Company. For dinner, I took my sister to shabu and after that we came home relax and I got to play games on the iPad (I never get to use the iPad). 

Ps. I feel envious seeing my friends go back to school in NYC or going to study abroad. 

20 August 2013


now playing: My Head Is An Animal (album) | Of Monster and Men
mood: exhausted

I've been pretty inspired by and have been drawing inspiration from Lils, Ivan Trejo, Chelsea Elayne, and my bestie C recently.

me0w. I fear for school right now.
but I'm a little excited that I've planned out a potential road trip up north with friends, then following going out of country with C if all follows through.
more excitingly, H is coming home and (haven't told him yet but he'll see from this) that ABCH & I are going to go to LA to go shopping and to the Getty. Sort of also want to take a trip to the Orange Circle...

I just wish I could learn how to focus more and stop putting things off until last minute.

14 August 2013


things to be happy about:
early mornings
scent-induced nostalgia
wearing lipstick
rainy day music
train journeys
how wood smells in the rain
¾ length sleeved shirts
ticket stubs from concerts, train rides, plane rides, cinemas

07 August 2013

keep you up all night

now playing: Mr. Hudson | Fred Astaire
mood: stressed
I hate going onto my computer because every time I do, I get carried away and waste so much time doing unproductive things.
I did find a lovely project, and (obviously) manage to read through all the posts so far up to date. It's a forty day dating experiment based on two New Yorkers with past relationship issues. My favorite post is probably day 5.
My three week class is so far intensive. With four hours of lab in the morning, a thirty minute break, then two and a half hours of lecture, I'm already worn out. Then follows another one hour of supplemental instruction. We have class three times a week and an exam on the fourth day. It makes me feel that I don't have enough time in a day to finish and cover or review everything I've learned that day. Hopefully I don't have to come in contact with another computer before Thursday afternoon.

Trying to shoot more in 35mm. Walmart was selling 37exp. disposables for the low price of $5! I feel a little regretful not buying any. Maybe next week?
I also managed to forget my entire pen bag at home, so I have to resort to using 'freebie' pens.

29 July 2013


now playing: little bit | lykke li
mood: tired
Went to my bestie's house yesterday for a hang out.
Before that I went over to B's mother's house to celebrate his birthday with them. T made us steak and potatoes and B's mother prepared a nice spring salad. There was so much food, I ended up so full. We did small present opening and sang the birthday song and cut a peach caramel custard pie, (since B requested no cake). hehehe what a witty mother...

We headed over to C's house after that.
A, A', & C had brunch already, since we were supposed to sleep over so we could partake in that but we didn't, so we missed out on that. No big deal though. Initially we wanted to swim, but when we got there, our moods changed so that also changed. We hung out and chatted until 6pm. The guys then wanted to start making pizza so while A and B did that, C prepped the salad and pizza toppings and A' cut watermelon. I tended the bacon and kbbq. Dinner was lovely as we sat and talked about future education plans and politics. Our conversation ventured onto studying abroad. We teamed up to do dishes after, and since we were a productive team, we ended the night watching a 'horror' movie: Cabin in The Woods.
Before we all parted, we cut cake (again) for B, but this time at C's house. B and I had picked out black forest cake from JJ Bakery the day before, so we enjoyed that.

I left that night having made plans with C about going abroad 2014, which is excitingly coming into plan because earlier tonight, my parents sounded like they were okay with me going abroad. (Cindy if you're reading this you're more than welcome to join if you wish!!). And I also learned that Bose's noise canceling headphones are the most awesome thing ever (if you enjoy serenity, peacefulness, and solitude while listening to music) but that it is also extremely expensive, so I won't be getting that anytime soon. C also gifted me another Voluspa candle in Santiago Huckleberry (thanks!♥)
Everything is going in plan. The only thing I'm scared of is my economics final that is coming this Thursday, but I think I should be able to do alright on it if I study enough...
Work is also coming to an end, and then I go back to school for chemistry classes. I just hope everything runs smoothly there and that I get time after to relax.


13 July 2013

paree je'taime

i'm listening to la vie en rose, and instantly all my dark blue night time shadow thoughts are wiped away, and instead the beautiful eiffel stands in the distance sparking and the streets are laid out with cobble stones, and everything in that minute seems too romantic to be consuming. a nice waiter leads me to a plastic weave-patterned chair at a cafe, the table is outside and he brings me a nice plate of pasta.

inconsistent. unreliable. this is exhausting.
you talk to me in the most sincere form,
consult me like i matter the most.

yet you turn around when i'm not looking and say there's someone else.
i think i've been so occupied with myself- vanity
that i haven't ever noticed that.

so tell me, have you lied to me this entire time? because i feel cheated.


call me nostalgic, foolish, stupid, careless, ignorant, delusional.
through all these words thrown at me, after going back in time,
i realized how delusional i've been

yet i still feel so guilty i want to cry.

07 July 2013


do you love me?
because i do.
i love you forever and ever.

01 July 2013


Unstable and indecisive, again.
Allowing other people eat me away while I stare quietly.

When am I able to take control of my life.
I think hard about what I've done and what I've done wrong.
All the things I haven't accomplished, rolls down my face as dying vitality.

How many more steps until I can become the person I need to be.
How much more failures can I swallow until they accept me.

01 June 2013


The thing about most people,
is that they are so fucking unreliable.
Even when you are there for them,
they're never, rarely, barely, there for you.
And to just try and make it up by giving a goddamn good excuse.
Or just saying sorry,
means nothing to me.

Keep that in mind the next time you say sorry to me.

31 May 2013

Spin me around

now playing: J.S. Bach | Partita for Violin no. 2 - Chaconne Performed by Itzhak Perlman

How does it feel to always have the leading role, attention.
It devours me.
Do you feel competition?
Do you think you'll be replaced one day?
I wouldn't let her.

16 May 2013

I wish I knew where to get another Lula magazine.
And I wish my mom had kept her record player.


I'm supposed to be writing my short paper on the ethics of cognitive enhancement for my biomed philosophy class. But I prefer spending time here, than on the cold darkness of Pages arguing a subject that won't ever be resolved.

(Taken with my iphone during spring break)
I am easily inspired by photography blogs, and vegan or breakfast (cooking) blogs; anything beyond that would be blogs that are like Bldg 25 where there are just an array of things that inspire me from DIY to styling to decor or music. Lately I've been listening to full albums on Rdio; I find some of these really alluring:
-An Awesome Wave | alt-j
-If You Leave | Daughter
-Hummingbird | Local Natives
-Teen Dream | Beach House
-The North | Stars
-The Lumineers | The Lumineers
I also wish I had more time to go shopping. I've seen some things online at Urban Outfitters, Madewell, American Apparel, and Brandy Melville that I'd like to make part of my wardrobe, but I seem to never have time for that. Shopping isn't the only thing, recently a lot of restaurants have been opening up which I haven't even had time to try yet. There's also an açai bowl & juice establishment at the OC Mart Mix that I really want to try. Speaking of which I have two midterms in the next two weeks and a presentation, then the weeks following are finals. Wow this quarter really flew by. I also should try and remember to register for my second part of summer school. Hope things aren't too chaotic for everyone else as it has been for me.
xox i

p.s. Sorry about this post being incredibly messy, but I just wanted to update everyone with things that I haven't posted on for a while since most of my recent posts have been complaint-revolving and self-loathe


I wish I could get back to blogging more like I did in high school. I remember I started blogging back in 2009, and I used to get inspired by a lot of random photography blogs. Back then fashion blogs or Youtubes were so rare, so not a lot of people blogged or had interest in blogging, it was mainly English lovers, or people who just loved to write. So blogging was a treasure. I still think it is pretty special today because even though 'blogging' is very common, very few people actually 'blog' when they say that they are 'blogging'. What people now mean is that they are on tumblr, clicking that 'reblog' button which means nothing but "I-want-this-overly-edited-picture-on-my-tumblr-too". Nobody says that they are going to go blog and actually go to their blog and write something meaningful or inspiring anymore.
I try to stay inspired.

03 April 2013

next time

+colette wings
+grand park
+getty villa
+more sample sales
+syrup desserts
+american apparel factory sale
+Joan's on Third
+Venice canals

19 March 2013

lust list

mood: irritated
now playing: Step | Vampire Weekend
+Vampire Weekend's new album Modern Vampires of the City
+Karen Walker sunnies
+Coco Mademoiselle Chanel parfum
+honey lavender tea and corn bread from Native Foods

08 March 2013

I got a car!

My parents bought me a red SUV yesterday afternoon.
I didn't really have a say in it, nor do I really need it.
But I am thankful.
Exams are slowly creeping in, and papers are all stacking up waiting to be written and turned in.
Stress is consuming me faster than I have ever imagine it to.
I feel so nauseous and nervous all the time. I'm restless and I just have this constant "I think I'm going to vomit" feeling and my head hurts.
I don't think I can do this anymore.

It's me vs science vs anxiety attacks.
And I'm in last place.

28 February 2013

Lust for Life

Good song, good video. Missing San Francisco and ABC♥
Miss hanging out, driving to random places and adventuring.
 I like the style of the video though, reminds me of the non-official mvs that lana made, or rather I like how its very vintage dreamy, and on film.


24 February 2013


I want a wedding with lavenders, pennant banners, pastel colors, and sparklers. Lemonade, record players, and slow dance. Beautiful typography, stenciled black, yet hand-written fonts too.

I’d enjoy string bulbed lights, and warm cozy nights. Glass pitchers of citric juices, colorful macarons, and tiny hors d’œuvres. Ribbons that flow forever and lace as delicate as snow, weaving through the tables and chairs. Branches of willow and birch holding up signs, seating guests, and gold metallic tipped corners sitting on grapevine balls.

Above the guests hang flowers sitting in light bulbs half filled with water, as they pull the willow’s leaves down closer. Small tealight candles and medium candles in mason jars flicker as they light up the tables under the cream chiffon-lined tents. Soft pink and white ranunculus, rose, dahlia, larkspur, and peony sit as center pieces..

Flower wreath adorning the curls that fall softly from my shoulder. And the sweet tender english net-veil just grazing my face….etc


”What the Hour Hand said to the Minute Hand”

“At 7:35 A.M, you lay your tired body on mine
before peeling off, like a slow band-aid.
At 8:40 you sprint home and make instant coffee.
At 9:45 we finally drink it, cold.
I finish your leftover half.
By 10:50 you are already breathless.
I live for every time we overlap.
When 11:55 comes I spend the entire minute convincing you to stay.
You never do.
By noon I put my hands on your shoulders and say, “Baby,
you’re getting thin. All this running in circles and barely sitting down to eat.”
At 1:05 you tell me that while you were gone,
15,300 babies were born.
At 2:10 you don’t say a word,
just come in and kiss me for sixty seconds straight.
At 3:15 we sit quiet, listening to rain falling everywhere
in the world at once: all 15,000 tons.
At 4:20 we pull a little from the tight joint I keep behind your ear.
You do not inhale.
At 5:25 you meet me for happy hour.
My neck already salted, a lime wedged in my teeth,
a shot of tequila sitting on the bar.
At 6:30 I hear the ticking.
I count your heartbeat like seconds between thunderclaps.
By 7:35 I can see you in the distance,
each second a tease until you drape over me.
We always love quick and you never let me hold you.
I dream of drinking you through a straw.
At 8:40 you watch my beard grow 0.00027 of an inch.
At 9:45 we do not speak.
Too many people have died since we last met.
At 10:50 we pray for a meteor,
at least a clumsy kid to spill sugar in our gears.
11:55 is my favorite.
We’re only apart for mere minutes.
But at midnight you’ll apologize sixty times
because it will always be like this.
At 1:04 AM I am already sleeping.
It’s exhausting loving someone
who is constantly running away.”
— Megan Falley

14 February 2013


The only thing that gets me through every part of my hypocritical life and surroundings.

"My plan in life is to get a good job and marry you and make you happy like never before"—B

I love him. To the moon and back. Weaved around every star.

30 January 2013


now playing: Bon Iver
currently: reading 40 some pages of a handout for English class
I miss New York, and the things that go along with it- Balthazar, SoHo, 5th Avenue, the honking of taxi's, sewer steam from the metro, the concrete jungle....

I miss taking pictures, film especially.
But I've been really inspired by Visual Supply Company's "Features" section, and I love love love VSCo's app for the iphone, to say the least.

27 January 2013


currently: going through a 'in the moment' blogging craze
now playing: Overdrawn | White Sea
So recently, or more specific this past Thursday, I started watching the HBO series Girls and I have to say it is really addicting, realistic, and therefore relatable- making the show down to earth and lovable. It's said that Gossip Girl was written about teens going through high school and college, while Sex and the City is on the married life and women wanting to be free and young again, thus Girls is centered around what happens in between that, the awkward phase where young women are fresh out of school, unemployed or just starting jobs, getting into and out of relationships, exploring, and the mayhem along with it all.
Oh, and I absolutely love the soundtrack.

(photo cred: cnn.com/HBO)
//This is totally irrelevant to the tv show, but rather another update on my life- so I've been trying to start working out again, in hopes of improving my health and toning up. Hopefully going to the gym this quarter works out consistently.

13 January 2013

sugar cookie candles

currently: belly down in bed typing away
listening to: frankie valli and the four seasons
I have been burning candles everyday, not sure if it's good for my health or not, but it sure smells great and relaxes me because who isn't relaxed by the scent of sugar cookies?

We put lights up today, and went to watch Gangster Squad- absolutely good.



I am really uncomfortable with my voice and when I hang out with people. I feel like I always have this choked up voice that's about to spew something incredulous out of me when I talk. It's like congestion mixed with your voice breaking before you cry. Plus I hate being socially awkward. It just makes everything worse.

I rather type everything up and write to people than talk.